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I feel so lucky to have the perfect husband for me. Thankfully he has never been said these things to me… but it always shocks me when others tell me that their husband has said these things to them. When you tear down your spouse, you are tearing down yourself. Both husbands and wives need to step up and be aware that they have the power to build up their marriages.
Here are 10 things you should NEVER say to your wife.
1. My mom does things this way… Your mom may be a wonderful woman, but you are not married to her. Please, respect your wife for the woman she is and the differences that make her special.
2. You’re acting like your mother… In truth, she may at times act like her mother, but she doesn’t want to be told that in a negative, condescending way, which not only is degrading to her but also her own mother. Not to mention these are fighting words. You’ve been warned!
3. Have you taken your medicine yet? Really, that is NOT helpful. If there is a medication that your wife can take to help her with a medical need, she doesn’t need it thrown in her face that she has something she is struggling with.
4. It’s my money. You are married. You share a home and a life. If you choose to keep accounts separate, make sure to share in the responsibilities. You are a team. You both share the burden and the benefits.
5. Why can’t you be more like… Comparison is the thief of Joy. Don’t compare her to an Ex-wife/girlfriend, movie star, or your best friends wife. She is not them.
6. You look fine. Fine is a very loaded word in a women’s vocabulary. It gives no true value or opinion. Please, let her know you care by taking the time to say a little more than “Fine.”
7. Maybe you should go on a diet. If your wife has gained a little weight or a lot of weight, she more then likely already knows that she has and is trying to deal with it in her own way.
8. What do you do all day? What she does all day is to take care of the children, the house, and many other responsibilities. Don’t think for a second that whether she works outside of the home or in the home that her job ever ends. Please, appreciate all the little things she does to keep your home in working order.
9. Stop talking. I am trying to watch the game (or playing X-box or Playstation). This is the loudest way you can tell your wife she is less important than the TV. Try kindly asking her if she could wait until a commercial to talk, and if not, pause the game or turn it off. In the end, it’s just a game.
10. This must be your time of the month… Say this only when you would like a flood of tears or hands around your throat! “That” time of the month is not a pleasant time in any woman’s life. Please, be respectful and even helpful by allowing us to go through that time without the pressure of your comments.
And two bonus things never to say to your wife…
11. Can’t you keep the kids under control? First, they are not just her kids. They are yours too. This comment puts all the responsibility of raising the kids on your wife. Children are not an inconvenience, they are a blessing from God.
12. I work all day. It’s your job to handle the kids. When you say statements like this, you imply that she doesn’t work at all. Children need parents who work together as a team giving them a stable home and loving environment.
Did I miss anything? What else should a husband never say to his wife?
Ouch!!!! The one your acting like your mother! My husband better not ever say this to me! LOL!
Exactly! Can you even imagine? Yikes!
Anything a man says to his wife that starts with My Mom… is a huge mistake. LOL
8 and 10 are BIG ones that start the battle in this house hold. I can’t believe he still hasn’t learned….
My husband has told me that I should consider going on a diet so that I’d feel more energy, but no matter how he tried to spin it, it made me mad! LOL – the tip to NEVER say this is a good one!
AWESOME post and SOOOOO true.. I will have to share this with my husband… hahah I can’t wait to see his face.. I hate when he tells me “What do you do all day”… UUggghh I work all day at the office (outside the home) and then work in my home office in the evening and I cook, do laundry and take care of the kids along the way.. So don’t ever ask me that..hahah… thanks for sharing
HAHAAH too funny. Pretty sure my hubby is pretty good about this. The only thing he says that angers me is “well, just stop it”. Like when I am really mad about something or stressed — well, just stop it. UM… it’s not that easy, pal!!
3
4
8
not in that order necessarily.
those are surefire ways to get your butt on the couch 😉
The only one my husband has ever said is You look fine. Of course, then I have to hound him to find out specifics. lol
Thankfully, my husband has not made these ‘errors.’ I’d have to punch him if he ever said it was time for me to go on a diet.
I can’t stand #1. It’s something my husband says to me about how different my cooking is from his mothers.
Ohhh, I love this. What a great post. Thankfully, my husband hasn’t said these. Maybe one but, he never did it again!
I agree on these too! I don’t think my hubby says any of them though.
Great list here and some great advice too. Thanks!
Oh man, just reading these is getting my blood boiling! LOL I’m not married, but my boyfriend is respectful enough to not say most of these things to me. And if he does, he’ll know never to say them again in the future 😉
Although I don’t necessarily agree with #3. I have a LOT of things I take on a daily basis in regards to supplements, vitamins, minerals, and sometimes medication so I forget a lot and a reminder is greatly appreciated for me!
I am very lucky to not be with someone that would ever speak to me in that manner. I do however have a friend that has a husband that does. It’s horrible and makes me uncomfortable to be around them when he’s there. Respect goes a long way.
Thankfully my husband is so appreciative of what I do as a stay at home mom and rarely does he ever say things he shouldn’t say to me. I’m a lucky woman!
oh my! This is quite the list. I am pretty sure my husband would need to run if he said a few of these to me
I am so thankful to be with a husband that does his very best to watch his words and not say flippant and hurtful things. This is a good list.
Great list, thanks for sharing!! 🙂
How anonymous is this site….the comment my husband said is awful.
Not that anonymous 🙂
Let’s see if my post gets the moderators approval?
As you probably correctly concluded, I’m not married and preferred divorce over all of my ex-wife’s constant complaining about how I chose to voice my opinions! Maybe you should be absolutely sure that the man you choose to marry is indeed the man for you because my ex knew the person I was when she said, ( I Do ), don’t expect us to change to fit into your idea of the perfect man, as my ex did because it will not happen. (It’s not always a lovely life)…
Hi Rambo,
I approve comments as long as they are not threatening or personal attacks. I’m sorry to hear you have had such a tough road to love. I’m sure you would agree that marriage is a two way street and both people have to want to be and stay married.
I hope you don’t give up on love! The right person is out there for you!