Pete and I love being the parents to all girls. We see it as nothing short of amazing to get to be their parents! We often get questions and comments about not having a son. Although we would have been thrilled to have boys or girls, we are very happy to have our girls and we never feel like we are missing out by not having a son too.
Here are 10 things you should never say to a mom (or dad) of all girls.
1. So are you going to keep trying for a boy? Why would we… if we had had a boy we would have been thrilled, just like we were thrilled when each of our daughters was born. In fact when we started the adoption process we were specifically asked if we wanted a boy or girl and we said girl (but we would have been just as happy if “she” had turned out to be a “he”).
2. Your husband must be so upset to not have a boy. What? Really? Nope, not mine! He loves being a dad to girls. Again, he wanted another girl, but would have been ecstatic with a boy too.
3. Does your husband hate being the only boy in the house? Not really, I mean the dog and two of the cats are male too so he’s not really alone… but I know that’s not what you meant. This makes us laugh each time it’s mentioned. The only time my husband is going to be upset is when the girls are all teenagers. That is going to be interesting!
4. Did you try for a boy each time? Say what? You aren’t asking about THAT are you? No, we didn’t try for anything for the kids that came to us that way. Not that it is any of your business if we did.
5. Aren’t you sad that you don’t have a son? No! And we get really upset when asked this in front of our girls. Girls are awesome, boys are awesome and that’s about it. Asking it in front of our daughters makes them feel like they are not as desirable as boys. Please don’t do this.
6. Did you cry when your last turned out to be a girl and not a boy? I did cry… how did you know? It wasn’t because she was a girl though… I cried from joy that she was here, healthy and ours!
7. You know there are things you could have done to ensure you had a boy. So sad, three girls. (normally said with a big sad face). Yes, I’ve heard of these “things” you speak of. We tried for 4 years to have our third child. We endeared many losses and rounds of IVF <— (the things you speak of that can guarantee gender if requested and paid for) we could have done that many times and we didn’t. We would have been thrilled with another girl or a boy, so we thought that was a pointless test and expense for us.
8. You know that you will have to pay for 3 weddings right? Yes. Thanks for the reminder. Maybe we should have thought about that before we had kids and only parented any boys we may have had. I mean what’s the point of having girls if you have to pay for their weddings too? I feel so silly for wanting and enjoying my daughters now. (said no “me” ever)
9. You know that girls leave their moms, boys don’t. Nope, haven’t heard this to be true. I have a mom and I haven’t left her yet, so…
10. Isn’t it sad that your husband won’t get to do “boy” things with a son? This one makes me want to scream. All of my girls have gone through fazes of only wanting to wear dresses or insisting on dressing up as a princess at Disneyland… but they have also all loved to play sports with their dad and that might be considered “boyish”. Our middle daughter is dedicated to Crossfit like her dad. Plus Pete is more than willing to do “girl” things… whatever that means or is. We don’t limit our daughters based on their gender so this has never been an issue. My oldest hasn’t ever missed watching a football game with her dad either. So no my husband isn’t missing out.